Some Great Weekends

I have had some great weekends these past few weeks. 3 weeks ago, I went to Atlanta to see WLP. It was the first time we had seen eachother in 3 years. I enjoyed my time with him. It was great to be in his arms for a few days. Not sure how, but somehow over the past 5 years he has become my best friend. While in ATL, Will and I went and saw Al for a little bit. The boys got a long great and it was good to see Al for the first time in 10 months. 2 weeks ago I went to Clarkston for our monthly trip. We taught ESL and it was soo awesome. A week ago I went to ATL for Al's Halloween party and had a great weekend. Then this past weekend I went to Auburn for homecoming. While, my life has been flipped upside down by my divorce, I am so thankful to be blessed by so many amazing friends. You guys have truly made an unbearable situation bearable. I love you all and am so thankful for you guys.

I Have The Best Sisters

Somehow, God saw fit to bless me with two amazing sisters. We are step-sisters but sisters none the less. Our parents have been married for as long as I can remember so to me they always have been and always will be my sisters. We may not always have the tightest relationship but I know that no matter what they will always be there for me and I for them. I am blessed to be the baby. Tiff is 6 years older than me. Well, almost. Her birthday falls 7 days after mine. And let me tell you how much fun it was to have to share our birthdays with each other. Probably more fun for me being the the younger sister and it wasn't much fun for me if that tells you anything about Tiff's feelings about it :) Kim is 10 years older than me and is by far the most driven and grounded of the 3 of us. A trait I so admire in her. On that subject Dad says that his 3 girls have 3 distinct personalities and I can see that. Like I said Kim is the grounded and driven of the 3 of us. Whether that was her God given personality or if it came from having Tiff and me for younger sisters I dont know. Kim has made a great life for herself and I will always be chasing after her accomplishments. Tiff is the free spirit. She always has had a hunger for life. She has also made a great life for herself and has a beautiful family. And here I am the baby, chasing after my eldest sisters accomplishments yet with hunger for life like my middle sisters but on fire. The thing that the three of us have in common is how we rally around each other when one of us is down and broken. In unexpected blessings, in sickness, and now in divorce, we always are there to help one another. Sometimes, its a hug, sometimes its standing at a hospital bed, and sometimes its a sweet post on facebook. I love my sisters and I couldnt imagine walking through life without them. On a specific note, my sister Kim wrote one of the sweetest comments ever on my facebook. I had posted a piece of flair that said "happiness is being divorced from an idiot" with the simple phrase "need I say more" beside it. My sister Kim wrote the following comment that brought me to tears. "sorry you have to go through it but glad it is almost over! You are strong, young and have so much life to live. Surround yourself with people that will build you up..not tear you down! You deserve better!"

Oh what powerful words

Jesus Paid It All

I hear the savior say

Thy strength indeed is small

Child of weakness watch and pray

Find in me thine all and all

Cause Jesus paid it all

All to him I owe

Sin had left a crimson stain

He washed it white as snow

Lord now indeed find

Thy pow'r and thine alone

Can change a leper's spots

And melt the heart of stone

Cause Jesus paid it all

All to him I owe

Sin had left a crimson stain

He washed it white as snow

And when before the throne

I stand in him complete

Jesus died my soul so save

My lips shall still repeat

Cause Jesus paid it all

All to him I owe

Sin had left a crimson stain

He washed it white as snow

Oh praise the one who paid my debt

And raised this life up from the dead

Oh praise the one who paid my debt

And raised this life up from the dead

Life Isnt Neat

Again another day without lyrics but I was chatting with a friend and we were dreaming together. I made the comment to him that we should both find the love of our lives and both live happily ever after. He agree that this would be a great plan. I then made the following statement that I feel needs repeating "if only life were that simple there is no happily ever after life doesnt get handed to you in a nice neat pretty package its messy and crazy and wild its tough, heartbreaking, and it sucks some times but thats what makes it beautiful". My prayer is that we are both able to find someone to share our lives with. But I also pray that we will have the strength, courage and wisdom to commit to someone our lives.

Taking That Leap Of Faith

Not just lyrics to a song today. A couple of weeks ago I had the opportunity to go ziplining. It was an amazing experience. Looking back on the experience I can see a lesson to be learned. The experience consisted of several platforms where we would hook our harness on to the zipline then run and jump off the platform and let our harness slide us along the zipline from one platform to the other. It was so much fun. Then we came to a platform where the guides told us we would be ziplining backwards and upside down. Yes we would have to stand on the edge of the platform, lean back and let go and fall and trust the harness would catch us. This picture is me doing that. It required complete trust in the harness. I had no control. I had to lean back and trust that the harness would catch me. The experience was amazing. Isnt that how our walk with God is sometimes. Life can be going great and then he asks us to stand on the ledge of the unknown and fall back and trust that he will catch us. We all face trying times, mine just happens to be divorce. We are left with no choice but to fall back and trust that God will catch us. The trials may be hard, dark, and insanely scary but Our Savior has overcome the world so we have nothing to fear. Easier said than done, I know. But ultimately the joy of falling and my sweet Jesus catching me is a joy like nothing else, something very worth the fall.

A Couple of Songs From The Movie Fireproof

These songs are part of the soundract to the movie fireproof. When the movie first came out, I was madly in love with Cole and the thought of ever being in the same position as the couple in the movie was foreign. The songs were beautiful but NEVER something MY heart would sing. Now a year and a half later these songs are the cry of my heart. My marriage has fallen apart and sadly we are not getting the happily ever after movie ending. My husband has chosen not to fight for our marriage and is filing for divorce. These lyrics are the cry of my heart to my Savior Jesus Christ.

Love Is Not A Fight

Love is not a place
To come and go as we please
Its house we enter in
Then commit to never leave

So lock the door behind you
Throw away the key
We'll work it out together
Let it bring us to our knees

Chorus
Love is a shelter in a raging storm
Love is a peace in the middle of a war
And if we try to leave
May God send angels to gaurd the door
Love is not a fight
But its something worth fighting for

To some love is a word
That they can fall into
But when their falling out
Keeping that word is hard to do.

Chorus

Love will come to save us
If we only call
He will ask nothing from us
But demand we give our all

Chorus

I will fight for you
Will you fight for me
Its worth fighting for

by Warren Barfield

While I'm Waiting

I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am hopeful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it is painful
But patiently, I will wait

I will move ahead
Bold and confident
Taking ever step in obedience
While I'm waiting
I will serve you
While I'm waiting
I will worship
While I'm waiting
I will not faint
I'll be running the race
Even while I wait

I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am peaceful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it's not easy
But faithfully, I will wait
Yes I will wait
I will serve you while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve you while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve you while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting on You, Lord.

by John Waller

Lead Me

Such an amazing song. The unanswered cry of my heart. My desperate plea to my husband.

I look around and see my wonderful life
Almost perfect from the outside
In picture frames I see my beautiful wife
Always smiling
But on the inside, I can hear her saying

"Lead me with strong hands
Stand up when I can
Don't leave me hungry for love
Chasing dreams, what about us
Show me your willing to fight
That I'ms still the Love of Your Life
I know we call this our home
But I still feel alone"

Sanctus Real